"Do I really have to do this?"

Do things that make sense for you, regardless of convention.

One of my favorite examples of this principle is from the entrepreneur Leila Hormozi.

Leila says she doesn't attend weddings, & rarely attends holiday or birthday parties.

“I don't really believe in a lot of them. And if I were to do all of them, I would spend most of my time celebrating things that don’t mean a lot to me,” she explains.

Every time I see her post a video about this topic, I run to the comment section to see the bewildered reactions of complete strangers:

"You can't sacrifice 1 day for your friends?"

"I usually love your stuff, but this is a bit too much."

"Clickbait, no way she actually misses her friend and family's big day."

And while some of these objections hold some weight, they miss the big point:

Most of the things you think you "have" to do are COMPLETELY optional!

If you’re like most people, weddings and holidays are important to you. That’s great! But I'm sure there's something in your life that you're currently doing because you convinced yourself: "Yeah, but I have to do that."

Find that thing, and ask yourself "Yea, but do I really have to?"

And I mean really ask. Go through the whole scenario in your head, playing out what happens if you don't go to that party, call that person back, or do the extra 4 years of school.

Will you be thrown in jail if you refuse to do it? Then by all means, do it!

But anything short of incarceration or bodily harm is fair game to be questioned as rigorously as you can if it causes you unnecessary stress.

Making any decision contrary to the common path isn't easy.

But are you so fragile that you can't afford to have the occasional uncomfortable conversation?

Because unless you are perfectly average in every behavior and belief, there’s no way that what works best for you happens to line up neatly with every societal norm.

Uncomfortable decisions or living an inauthentic life...Which sounds worse to you?