"It gets easier, but it never gets easy"

“It gets easier, but it never gets easy.”

That’s a Jason Isbell lyric about sobriety, but it may as well be a description of any discipline.

It is a concept that applies to something as simple as waking up early, but it can also apply to something much more substantial, like learning to live without a loved one.

But when we struggle, we are often quick to think that something is wrong.

• Am I broken?

• Why can’t I get used to this already?

• When will I get back to normal?

Luckily, the answers to these questions are simple:

• You are not broken.

• You will never get completely used to this.

• You will never be the same person you once were.

I’ve met many alcoholics, and they all emphasize the fact that the urge will always remain to some degree.

The beast never dies — instead, you learn to live with it. You learn to ignore its whispers and temptations.

And it is a skill, so you get better at that the more you resist and the more you learn about yourself. Nonetheless, you will never be rid of it.

“It gets easier, but it never gets easy.” (emphasis mine)

And that’s ok. It doesn’t mean you are broken.

No, it actually means the exact opposite! It means you are operating under the same psychology as every other human that has ever lived.

It means that despite the friction, you are doing the right thing.

It reminds me of how Ernest Hemingway once defined courage:

“Grace under pressure”.

Pressure, or adversity, is what allows normally mundane abilities like keeping your cool to turn into admirable qualities.

Use your struggle as an opportunity to show your strength, not as an excuse to say “screw it all”.

Jason follows up the lyrics I mentioned earlier with: “I can say it’s all worth it, but you won’t believe me.”

I feel the same way.

You won’t believe me either.

You’ll have to stay disciplined enough yourself to find out that it is worth it.

See you on the other side, my friend.

If you want to listen to the song that inspired this post, click here.

Jason Isbell has become one of my favorite storytellers over the past year, and in my opinion, he is one of the best songwriters alive. Give his most recent album Weathervanes a listen if you’re curious.

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